Thoughts of a Senseless Mind

The Horror of the Past

2009-01-11T20:02:00.003+08:00

the past will hunt you.. whoever said the past should be forgotten and live life for the present is a moron... one way or another ur past will come back to hunt you and it will hunt u real bad.... thus u should always clean up the path and make sure no crumbs are left to guide it back to u...

wwwaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh

2008-09-17T21:24:00.002+08:00

i feel like im the most boring most pathetic person in the world..if u talk to me right now the only conversation ur gonna get is
1. medicine related - yup if ur not into medicine related stuff like Pedia, OB or the whinings and qualms of a medical clerk/slave then im not ur person
2. boys - yeah the never-ending, since the beginning of time, favorite topic of mine.. boys/men why we love 'em hate 'em and cant live without them... and my neverending search for mr. right which turns out to be mr. MIA for now.
3. my life - my constant complaints in life uber boring booze-filled, lowlife...
that's it!!! its the only thing i could talk about.. even im bored with myself... haayyy
somebody shoot me right now

Hooked Up

2008-05-08T09:15:00.002+08:00

yes there were others... i didnt shed a lot of tears, i didnt get oh so depressed... we didnt really became it and it was a one way a thing i liked him he didnt want me... we're still friends but then thats not enough for me so i let go... i thought distance and time can make me forget but again my heart beats with every little message with any little connection.. i guess somehow my heart is still waiting and hoping.. im still hooked up... FUCK!!!

Pre-Hell Week

2008-02-26T07:52:00.002+08:00

im dying... im tired... iv focused my energy into too many useless stuff. wasted my time over drama on tv and now im digging my hole to fail...

An Early Chrsitmas Whining

2007-12-10T10:15:00.000+08:00

ok its christmas once again.. its usually the time of the year where im super happy with all the shopping and parties and booze all around but then again this year due to my utter brokeness christmas is simply a bullshit situation. please dont give me the "christmas is not just about the gifts.." line i know but im a superficial girl i love gifts either i give it or recieve is the same way for me but how can i do that without money???!!! every year i get poorer and poorer just as the economy is goin down. fuck this life i need a job!! haha well maybe 3 years from now i'll finally earn my own money which im sure will definitely be not enough... here i go again whine whine whine but what can i do this is what im good at right??!!
HAPPY HOLIDAYS to all ye rich people!!!

Boys again and again

2007-09-18T08:15:00.000+08:00

i've met a lot of perverts like major ones, but surprisingly there are still a few nice guys around but it all ends there... at the end of the day i still go home alone.. no one dares to make the extra leap maybe i am also scared to take it... afraid to share my world with someone.. afraid to give up this so called "single-blessedness"... some are sweet.. some are rich.. some are cute.. some are nice.. some are just plain duh... so what's a girl got to do? am i really waiting for someone or is this really it? i just have to accept the fact that u will never get that ideal person and u just have to deal with it...

Erap's Conviction

2007-09-12T15:38:00.000+08:00

lets pretend im still into politics.. still am actually except maybe for the fact that med students are usually apathetic for stuff that doesnt involve "med" stuff or maybe my lack of knowledge and understanding of the law... anyways what can i say i pity erap if only he was smart enough to escape or not stupid enough to believe that the masses can help him through this somehow in this damned government - power and money will always prevail and maybe justice too because he did plunder our money but the thing is i believe one time or another everyone had their fair share of plunder, of graft and corruption but still they're smart enough not to get caught or better yet not get convicted... yes there's proof that we do not look at position and power to get someone convicted like in the US where rich hollywood stars get imprisoned for drinking and driving e.g. like Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan... (is it right to compare them to Erap??hehe) but the thing is convicted or not with the money his gonna return some Php700+ million and mansion where would that money go? will justice really prevail? Or is ths gonna be one of those hot issues that just go away once the media hype goes away? i hope not.. i still believe that our country can rise up from all this and maybe just maybe be the pearl that we truly are...

CURRENTLY FEELING: diplomatic

CURRENT CONDITION: constipated haha

M Back!!!

2007-09-11T08:36:00.000+08:00

im assuming nobody reads my blog here anymore since i moved to multiply already but i figured here i can still have my anonymity somehow and i can share my crazy adventures without having alot of people read it... so yeah im back
what i have i been doing lately??? busy with school, sorority stuff, dating, going out and basically living a life of a 23 y/o old sent to hell for med school haha it isnt really hell but it does feel like it sometimes both the perks and downsides of being in hell haha...
oooppss got class...

scattered

2007-01-13T14:10:00.000+08:00

Scattered thoughts

I need a journal!!! some thoughts and dreams has been bugging my head for sometime and these are things i wanna keep to myself... im not a private person u see.. i want to share to the whole world all my emotions, all the thoughts so if i keep all these thoughts in my head m gonna burst and it might be to someone not worth trusting so really thats not good. i'd kill for my own pensieve where i can leave all my thoughts there... so what do i do? i write my private thoughts on bond papers now haha there are just some things i want out of my system and i do that by writing... waah i need a journal but i have alot of studying to do so that might just have to wait...

besfrens

2007-01-04T20:18:00.000+08:00

During Sunshine's wedding in San Fabian with her baby Zion Shaz.. and Maggie's pregnant too.. =) Yey!!!
HOT... HOTTER... HOTTEST!!! hehehe
Looking great!!! My bestfriends for life!!!
Yes we're a sight for sore eye!!! hehe

happy new year!!!

2007-01-03T17:25:00.000+08:00

happy new year!!! waah another year getting closer to the end of the road of schooling (i hope!) im getting scared... i dont know whats in store for me this year but i dont wana make plans or resolutions or year-ender lists of what happened.. the story of my life blah blah im taking it one day at a time... COME WHAT MAY! bahala na... year started with a bang and a lot of kaboom and boom tarat tarats hehe... here's to hoping the year of the boar is not gonna be a year of dirt and laziness and piggy stuff hehe CHEERS TO 2007!!!

2006-12-19T23:02:00.000+08:00

WEAR OUT LOUD PARTY

2006-12-05T15:20:00.000+08:00

WEAR OUT LOUD PARTY NOVEMBER 30 @KATIPS BAR...
I SALUTE ALPHA DELTA MU SORORITY!!!

2006-12-03T13:18:00.000+08:00

WAAH!!! I WANT NOW NA!!! IM A DONUT FANATIC AND KRISPY KREMES ARE LIKE THE BEST... AVAILABLE AT THE FORT... DAMN WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE SO FAR?! =( IF ANYONE CAN GIVE ME A DOZEN OF THESE I SWEAR U'LL BE REWARDED GRATEFULLY HEHE BABAW KO BUT I WANT WANT WANT!!! YUM YUM!!!

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-12-02T23:18:00.000+08:00

thoughts from the text tube

i dont know why we all hang on to something we know we're better off letting go... it's like we're scared to lose what we dont even really have... some of us say we'd rather have that something than absolutely nothing.. but the truth is "to have it halfway is harder than not having it at all" =(

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-12-02T11:39:00.000+08:00

My boobs and me
Its like me and my boobs are a different entity... I swear my boobs get a whole lot of attention than my face which I find really annoying… but as much as my boobs are as big as they are they don’t seem to be picking up any guys.. yeah I get the perverted guys here and there but they don’t count… and I don’t even get first pick… I know im not a looker, I mean im not as pretty as Paris Hilton or Anne Curtis but I am at least good-looking if I may say so myself but I think there’s something about me that’s very intimidating.. its either my boobs are too big or im just not “pick-up” material for decent guys if u know what I mean.. its frustrating really.. im like the girl who guys want only when they want a little something something but not some girl they would actually go out with exclusively and be serious about… as I heard my guy friends categorize some girls… may pang-bahay at may pang-sex lang and I think I’m always categorized on the pang-sex part despite the person that I am just because I have big boobs. I am a 36B in case ur wondering and its not even that big.. okay fine it is but its not like a cup D or anything and I’m not even thin… I’m fat I have bulges all over so they can attribute my big boobs to me being fat right? Okay I know I shouldn’t be complaining for I am “blessed” as they placed it but really I’d rather describe it as “cursed” I am not a pornstar and I have no plans in going to any sexy whatever shit I just wanna be appreciated physically not because I have big boobs, I do have a face and I’m pretty sure my brains our bigger than my boobs darnit!!!

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-11-28T09:52:00.000+08:00

WISHING...
i wish i could be spontaneous, do something out of the blue just because my gut says so.. its been awhile since I last had crazy fun out of my spontaneity.. lately all the things i do are planned... and i always end up being disappointed.. you see i always have high expectations, I guess I should have sticked to my belief that u should always expect the worse from everything that way when they show up better u'll be more appreciative of it and u never get disappointed. pessimistic i know but atleast less pain...
i wish i was a little kid satisfied with the little stuff.. not craving for so much... dealing with so much... i wish i could lessen everybody's pain so i myself can free myself of the guilt, of the pressure, of the loneliness...

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-11-26T20:09:00.000+08:00

Things are so not going my way lately… and im hating it.. hating it… hating it!!! Fine its just a few simple stuff.. like I didn’t get to the mall last Friday because all the cabs were taken and we’ve been waiting for an hour already.. and then Saturday got ditched because I woke up late and then I couldn’t find a decent top for the party and then today the stupid artist tried to put his “art” into my top which I wasn’t lovin’ so I had to whine and almost throw a tantrum so he had to change it so I had to wait again and then since I have such long feet I couldn’t get the red shoes I wanted.. so there it was basically about shopping but still I’m pissed off.. pissed off.. pissed off!!!

2006-11-22T22:40:00.000+08:00

NIGHT OUT WITH JUREANE & SARAH.. WE ALMOST GOT PICKED UP BY TWO GUYS PROBABLY THINKING WE'RE HOOKERS WALKING AROUND MORATO.. DAMN I DIDNT EVEN LOOK SLUTTY THAT NIGHT... OEL IT WAS STILL FUN ALL THE SAME...

2006-11-14T21:03:00.000+08:00

Hi! please come and join the fun at the WEAR OUT LOUD PARTY: a statement shirt party.. presented by ALPHA DELTA MU SORORITY for the benefit of the UST OB ward. November 30, 2006 (thursday) 7pm Featuring Up Dharma Down, Proteinshake, Helen, Fragile, Makopa, Drive55 and more. Tickets at Php 150.00 with lots of free beer! See u at Katips Bar and Restaurant at Sct. Torillo st., QC (behind Tomas Morato) come in a statement shirt and i'll see u there!! for tickets just text 0917-9349575...good music, great people, the best party!!! dont miss it!!! il c u!!! please repost... tnx!!

**Dec. 1 is a holiday!!!

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-11-08T22:13:00.000+08:00

"People always look for the best and when we finally see it, we take it for granted expecting to find a better one, not knowing it was the best... " - quotable quote from my good friend Socrates =p

thoughts of a senseless mind

2006-11-05T19:43:00.000+08:00

FOR REAL!!!
Interesting...

surprise surprise some guys are actually scared of virgins.. hhmm. for awhile i thought some guys just want to devirginze every damn girl in the world.. but i suppose to them a virgin is scary because there's a potential for her to be clingy to the guy and perhaps idealistic when it comes to relationships or they just dont want a newbie. experienced women are so much hotter or something like that.. so its both scary and risky.. oel whatever their reason is good for them atleast they know what they want...

2006-10-31T18:39:00.000+08:00

NETWORKING

im realy really bored... and its kinda scary when i get bored co'z i get a little crazy and do stupid stuff good thing im in the province otherwise... well lets just say im up to something i might regret sooner or later... nweis so what do i do instead? i go online and sign up for every damn networking site available. okay i already have my friendster account, and now i have one at tagged.com and myspace.com and some other site i dare not mention hehe can i just say that the myspace photos of most of the people i've seen particularly girls are pretty worrisome and i begin to doubt what myspace is all about. most of them show breasts and porno like pics its like a pimp site hiding behind the so-called "networking" thing hehe as for the boys well i havent been searching that much but there's a lot of foreign members there and i say "yikes!" hehe im not a racist, i would actually want to date a british guy with a really thick accent or a spanish guy hehe but other than that im all for filipino-chinese guys.. there's something about foreigners that scares me.. they're too aggressive for my taste... hehe
oel sembreak is just about over after the halloween season so im dreading it i dont want to get back to school! im enjoying my eat-tv-sleep-play-sleep-eat-sleep-house, m.d marathon-sleep schedule now hehe gosh and its how many days more before christmas and im still flat broke!! waaah.. burp* burp** =)

Hateness

2006-10-24T10:35:00.000+08:00

Don’t you just hate it

1… when you’ve studied ur butt off and u still fail while those people who slept the whole night passed?

2. … when you’ve seen the hottest, smartest, sweetest guy in the world and you cant have him co’z he’s either taken by an ugly, undeserving girl or he’s gay?

3. … when ur dieting and u still gain weight while other people eat all they want and not even gain a pound or two?

4. ... when you need peace and quiet and everyone seems to be in the mood to make chitchat and scream their lungs out

5. ... when you get all dolled up yet no one seems to notice?

6. ... when the "evil" people seems to get all the good stuff and you the "good" one does not even get a good pair of shoes =p ?

7. ... when you finally have money to go shopping, all the good stuff are gone and you end up going home empty-handed?

8. ... when you're all depressed for being alone and suddenly couples are popping everywhere pdaing and stuff?

9. .. when you think that you're finally over someone but a simple message from him will make your heart stop beating.. again... and then again... ?

10. ... when you have a really bad hangover after a night of drinking and you cant remember you kissed a really hot guy and can not savor the memory co'z you had amnesia from last night (hehe) ?

Not Again =(

2006-10-20T11:35:00.000+08:00

sembreak is here yet im not as excited aside from the fact that im dead broke (seriously!) i had to take my remedial exam for clinical pathology just because of 1 freakin point...equivalent to a few less hours of sleep.. fuck and now im in a whole lot of stress.. if i fail the test i'll be delayed for one year.. and i'd rather quit medschool if thats gonna happen. i was removals queen way back college haha but cmon i didnt like pharma that much.. med well it was my dream.. still is actually so y d hell cant i just let myself indulge and invest in it.. y am i still slacking? because there are so many other things i want to do thats y.. i dont even go out that much anymore. ok enough whining... it is my fault and i might as well accept the fact that im not the same old smartass kid who can pass without studying... my neurons deteriorated with all the drinking n smoking (from the past and occasionally)... and in med school its not enough to be smart, there's a lot of work to be done so you really have to be studious, patient, non-narcoleptic, focused, and nerdy!

Let there be light

2006-10-01T21:51:00.000+08:00

milenyo is one hell of a typhoon... i realized i cant live without electricity, water flowing through the faucet, cellphone, internet... how did our grandparents lived through it??? oel life was pretty simple back then and you'll never actually miss something that was never there right?

finally...

2006-09-26T10:57:00.000+08:00

"sis ko..." I never thought that simple two words can actually make me smile for the rest of the week... I was finally introduced to "HIM" Mr. LRU guy, the guy who makes me smile despite all the toxicities of med skul... okay he wasnt that friendly and he didnt even offer his hand for me to shake but atleast he knows me now... good enough for me... hehe too bad he doesnt dance, I would have loved to shake my butt off and danced all night but unfortunately all i can do was smile and dance along with my sisses.. oel maybe next time i can just have a drink with him or something... wishful thinking!!!

ano ba talaga inaantay ko?

2006-09-18T01:23:00.000+08:00

nakakahiya... gabing-gabi na at hindi ko pa din tapos basahin ang halos 2 linggo ko ng pinipilit tapusin na chapter sa pathology... ngunit gusto ko siyang makausap.. nagaantay sa hindi malamang dahilan.. gaya lang din siya ng iba mabulaklak manalita at madaming sekreto, pero inaantay ko pa din siya.. malaki nga siguro sira ko sa ulo dahil sa tagal ko ng pagaantay.. sa ano? ewan ko hindi ko din sigurado ang sagot... madami naman ng dumating at umalis at hinayaan ko lang dahil pihikan daw ako pero meron akong inaantay kung tao man un o hindi ewan ko lang talaga....

My New National Anthem

2006-09-16T17:11:00.000+08:00

Push The Button (Sugababes)

I'm busy throwing hints that he keeps missing

Don't have to think about it

I Wanna kiss and

Everything around it but he's too distant

I wanna feel his body

I can't resist it

I know my hidden looks can be deceiving

But how obvious should a girl be?

I was taken by the early conversation piece

And I really like the way that he respect me

I've been waiting patiently for him to come and get it

I wonder if he knows that he can say it and I'm with it

I knew I had my mind made up from the very beginning

Catch this opportunity so you and me could feel it 'cos

If you're ready for me boy

You'd better push the button and let me know

Before I get the wrong idea and go

You're gonna miss the freak that I control

I'm busy showing him what he's been missing

I'm kind of showing off for his full attention

My sexy ass has got him in the new dimension

I'm ready to do something to relieve this mission

After waiting patiently for him to come and get it

He came on through and asked me if I wanted to get with him

I knew I had my mind made up from the very beginning

Won't miss this opportunity so you and me could feel it 'cos

If you're ready for me boy

You'd better push the button and let me know

Before I get the wrong idea and go

You're gonna miss the freak that I control

I've been dropping so many hints

You're still not getting it

Now that you've heard everything I have to say

Where we gonna go from here?

After waiting patiently for him to come and get it

He came over and asked me if I wanted to get with him

I knew I had my mind made up from the very beginning

Won't miss this opportunity so you and me could feel it 'cos

If you're ready for me boy

You'd better push the button and let me know

Before I get the wrong idea and go

You're gonna miss the freak that I control (I control)

If you're ready for me boy (For me boy)

You'd better push the button and let me know

Before I get the wrong idea and go (Oh, oh)

You're gonna miss the freak that I control Ohhhhhhhh Ohhhhh Ohhhhhh

more pix @ 22

2006-09-15T08:38:00.000+08:00

Stargazers are the best flowers! they made my room smelling great and made me smile the whole time until it withered away....
we just loved the mural... nevermind that we cant really blend in with the jungle effect
uuhhmmm.. ges what we're trying to do here...
bad imitaton of a monkey...

Pictures from a year older me

2006-09-15T08:27:00.000+08:00

My friends idea of a joke... im thania as renamed by our terror facilitator in pharmacology haha... who is joe? refer to previous blogs....

Sec D4 and ang sabit na si billy who by the way has a flesh eating bacteria on her face wahaha

Microwave bloopers

2006-09-03T13:58:00.000+08:00

another burned lunch... i swear i will never use the microwave ever again.. you see our maid is not around on weekends so im left to reheat whatever food is in the fridge.. i have the option to reheat it on the burner or on the microwave so the lazy butt that i am i always opt to use the freakin microwave... its either i set the temperature to high or i exceeded the minutes.. so yeah another burned lunch.. one time i burned the popcorn.. imagine POPCORN! i mean c'mon how undomesticated can i get or shall i say how dumb can i be?! urrgghh my mom should have thought me how to cook and i wouldnt have turned into a freakin spoiled, undomesticated twerp... haha blame it on someone else (fyi: in psych its called projection) oel i wonder what my dinner would look like later hehe... oel toodles another toxic week ahead....

on pain and waiting...

2006-09-01T23:15:00.000+08:00

"If pain must come, may it come quickly coz I have a life to live and I need to live it in the best way possible. If he has to make a choice, may he make it now. Then I will either wait for him or forget him. Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering." -- paulo coelho

text mates

2006-08-30T16:44:00.000+08:00

i was staring at the wall with my mind fleeting with different thoughts last night... no one was texting me.... my phone was like dead... well except for the usual inbox flooders who have unlimited text and have nothing else better to do but congest the network and sulitin ang unlimited texting(haha as if im not like that) and then i came to realize wala na akong textmate... haha jologs and pathetic i know but remember the days of texting some stranger and the excitement of not knowing the person... the adventure of not knowing the person and not really caring what he looks like as long as u have someone to tx with when u cant sleep and u have nothing else better to do... i miss that.. just as much as i miss flirting.. haha... i know most of them were butt ugly and wasnt really worth my time but atleast i had some ego boosting... which i totally need right now... i miss those days when life was simple and when mababaw lang ang kaligayahan ko... now that im older it seems like happiness and fulfillment is so out of reach.. it seems you actually have to work for it... it sucks being old... or maybe im just not in a good mood lately...
currently feeling: kilig because my crush is sitting a few feet from me
currently listening to: the throbbing of my head, and the chatter of the boys next to me
current mood: depressed

alcohol failure

2006-08-20T21:00:00.000+08:00

its the long awaited weekend god knows i so need a break from all the toxicities of med life so yeah i have 3 days of rest.. so of course i do what i do best go out and drink.. but no friday i went barhopping with my sisses to look for a place for our concert/party in timog then we went to metrowalk and crashed to a party of a friend of a friend but it seems like getting drunk or tipsy was so not meant to be.. we weren't exactly in the mood i guess. then last night i invited my highschool friends to drink at my place we had lambanog and gin but we didnt quite enjoy the drinks so we didnt exactly drink alot.. i guess something is inhibiting me from getting drunk must be divine intervention.. because god wants me to study.. eeeeekkkkk... so yeah my weekend was good but it could have been better...

im 22!!!

2006-08-11T22:31:00.000+08:00

i just turned 22 last august 9 and man do i feel old!!! now im officially in my 20s no more pacute-cute...
lately...
im bitter but happy
im rusty but golden
im boy-crazy but single
im stressed but beautiful
im stupid but smart
im slacking but productive
im neurotic but sane
im old but old hehe
happy birthday to me!!! thank you to everyone who greeted me... i am truly blessed for i have so many friends who truly loves me... i love you guys!!! forever and forever amen hehe

~Shifting Moods~

2006-08-05T19:13:00.001+08:00

Sex with a Stranger for Luck

2006-08-05T19:13:00.000+08:00

As I was browsing one of the magazines in the parlor while pampering myself with a hair spa, foot spa, manicure and pedicure my eyes fell on one of the articles about having sex with a stranger. No it wasn’t an article about sluts or one night stands, it was actually a custom – a type of pilgrimage to Prince Samodra, who was sentenced to death for having an affair with his mom/stepmother, entombed together in the mountain. He was said to be a benevolent royal who cared about the welfare of the masses. Here’s how the custom works: You have to climb to Kemuskus mountain in central Java, Indonesia wherein the pilgrims must have sex with the same partner for 7 Friday pons, a spiritually significant Javanese calendar that occurs every 35 days. Only after the 7th visit will their fortunes change, if they don’t stick to the same partner each time, they will have to start all over again. By imitating the infidelity near the grave of Prince Samodra, the ghost of the prince will favor them. And you must find a partner who’s sincere about the pilgrimage otherwise it wont work. How sick is that?! People went there to change their fortune, for good luck to be rich, to have a better job, to a better family life, to good health… can u imagine the type of people who actually go to this mountain? They must be really desperate and crazy to actually believe any of it. Oh yeah they even have small rooms you can rent near the grave… yikes!!!

tttoooooxxxxxiiiicccccc!!!

2006-07-29T10:24:00.000+08:00

damn im beginning to think i made a huge mistake in taking up medicine... i could be working by now (yeah ryt!) and earning money but no i had to pursue my dream of becoming a doctor... n years from now.. urrgggh! anyways had our first physical exam on a patient yesterday.. damn hu said history taking was easy.. u actually had to know each symptom with corresponding important questions... and the 1st time i had to forget to bring my medicine bag was during our ward time! uuurrgghh! but atleast the patient was cooperative and wasnt really a hard case... physical exam of all systems was pretty hard especially i have a bad ear.inspection, palpation, percussion, auscultation.. sounds easy but not knowing exactly how to do it right well lets just say i was LOST.. am i really gonna be a doctor? i sure hope so...

Get over It!!!

2006-07-20T23:46:00.000+08:00

yup im so busy i think i should not waste my time being bitter and hoping for something that I myself am not sure if I can handle it, more so have time for anything but school and sleep and endulging in food. So yeah im so over u and a bunch of other guys haha I dont know if ill be able to blog after this coz we're going to hell and maybe whatever is worse than hell in pharma! yup im having a hard time coping up with the requirements because im always voted to be leader just because im a pharmacist.. im not a good pharmacist kung baga "latak" lang me ng UP i was just lucky to have really smart classmates and was waved in. So yeah i dont know what my subsec was thinking... research and stats arent really my thing so goodluck to us. and i have a conclusion to make: pharmacists especially the old ones are BIATCHES!!! here, there, and everywhere hahaha

MANHID o NAGMAMANHIDMANHIDAN

2006-07-14T22:26:00.000+08:00

BAKIT BA MAY TAONG SADYANG MANHID O NAGMAMANHIDMANDIDAN... OBVIOUS NAMAN GUSTO MO SIYA ABA MAGTATANONG PA KUNG KUMUSTA NA UNG FRIEND MONG MAY BF NA!!! ANO UN GUSTO KA PA NIYANG SAKTAN? O DI NIYA TALAGA ALAM NA GUSTO MO SIYA? ANO BANG GUSTO NIYA SABIHIN KO SA KANYA HARAP-HARAPAN "HOY GUSTO KITA MATAGAL NA OBVIOUS BA?" OR BAKA NAMAN STYLE UN PARA IPADAMA SAYO NA DI KA NIYA GUSTO? PERO BAKIT KELANGAN MAGING MABAIT PA? BAKIT KELANGAN KAUSAPIN AT PAASAHIN PA? BAKIT KAHIT MATAGAL NA AY NAAALALA PA DIN ANG MGA DATING PINAGUSAPAN? BAKIT HINDI NA LANG AKO? MANHID KA BA O GAGO KA LANG TALAGA?!

And then they come in twos...

2006-07-11T14:47:00.000+08:00

school has given me enough worries with the addition of the stress from the initiations of our 3 new sissies, and the never ending drama of life itself I dont want to be reminded that I am single... but it seems like everywhere I go people seem to come in twos.. with that i mean couples popping out of nowhere... in our section there are around 5 couples already that developed out of the stress in med... because u see as u grow older in med school it gets harder to find someone, aside from the limited choices, there's also the very limited time to socialize... here i go whining again fuck! i think i failed my first long quiz in pharmacology my supposedly "area of expertise"... life sucks but im loving it!!! hehe

reinventing myself...

2006-06-25T16:27:00.000+08:00

got a haircut due to my sis' convincing powers that i look better w/ straight hair... so fine what the heck i got my curls chopped off.. it was fun having curly hair for 6months but maybe the sultry, horny look aint for me because obviously im still single haha i know its not just the hair but hey i can reinvent myself over n over again ryt? no recent pics yet but imagine my hair 5 years ago, short, straight, nice girl effect.. oel got alot of studying to do.. urrgggh 2nd yr med is toxic!!! and i dont have my books yet. darn!! oel hopefully i'll get it this week... wish me luck!

RBLDf

2006-06-21T20:03:00.000+08:00

Your exact opposite:

The Dirty Little Secret

Deliberate Gentle Sex Master

The Wild Rose
Random Brutal Love Dreamer (RBLDf)

Colorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose.

Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you're the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.

You don't seem to take yourself too seriously, and that's refreshing. You aren't uptight; you don't over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn't a top priority--a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven't had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You're very selective.
The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You're out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone.

"You're never truly single as long as you have yourself."

ALWAYS AVOID: The Bachelor

CONSIDER: The Vapor Trail.

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: ch0c0h0l1c

2nd yr med life begins

2006-06-18T22:17:00.000+08:00

okay... school started like a few days ago but it was basically just orientation and never-ending need for money to pay for handouts, books, med gadgets... whatever! im still broke and im still not feeling ready for another grueling year in med school. I still want to bum around and watch one tree hill marathons and grey's anatomy... i want to go out and find a boyfriend which im sure im never gonna find in the faculty of medicine and surgery.. why? well because im too picky and there's just not enough choices in school plus the fact that im not a supermodel to have very high standards but heck i know what i want so thats what i want to get.. so i'll wait no matter how long it takes (i think)...

what's in store for me this year? well im having pharmacology this year hopefully ill do good considering im a licensed pharmacist already who by the way have very minimal knowledge compared to Dr. Mom haha i swear my mom knows more drugs for certain ailments as compared to me except for her prescribing antibiotics to every pain, colds, cough... i have OB, Pedia, Surgery, Psych-CN, Micro, Patho wherein hopefully I'll discover what i really want to specialize in someday.. oel got to sleep early.. so toodles!!!

broke n depressed

2006-06-10T17:09:00.000+08:00

its a few more days left before school starts and im 11 days early to be back in manila before school starts but times are hard and i cant waste money.. usually i enjoy being early because that means i have more time to shop, go out, party, flirt around and get some peace and quiet but this summer i just basically stayed home and watch tv all day and scream at the kids... now im back at my own world, im just chilling and straining my eyes out with one tree hill marathons... i think im getting old and boring believe it or not. my friends cant seem to believe that im kinda changing my ways not for anyone or anything.. im changing and im afraid because i think i no longer enjoy going out and being the party planner all the time.. im becoming the person i never expected to be me... plus the fact that im getting poorer by the day is not much helping in boosting myself..oel i guess its just downtime with me right now i'll get over it.. hopefully!!!

Last Days Of Summer

2006-06-02T22:53:00.000+08:00

My beshpwen Joe who finally decided to show up!!!
We look like fucking freakos...

Jureane, Garry (the guy in black, yeah he owns the speedboat and a bunch of other stuff believe it or not), and moi in the beach enjoying the sun...

My evil Twin! Yes she's single too... enjoying our misadventures...

>>>Babysitting is one hella of a job and I have no plans of getting into anytime soon... if u wanna be stressed out take care of 3 crazy 3-yr olds who loves fighting, wrestling, crying, screaming and basically making a mess!!! Plus siblings with a bunch of problems of their own... if this is how a vacation should be then somebody shoot me. The only fun thing about summer is hanging out with my old friends... yeah love them even if we too have a bunch of problems of our own that never seems to go away.. damn i am old.. oel got to ride a speedboat tnx to garry, even if its along pantal river with fishpens we got to a good spot in bonuan beach which was really cool... it would have been perfect if we were with hot guys... oel cant have it all atleast we were with some guys haha really nice to have a sweet, generous, crazy friend hehe love u garry! next time take us wakeboarding in ur island and we'll see about ur "deal" haha

IS ALL ABOUT ASS

2006-05-29T09:42:00.000+08:00

LIFE IS ALL ABOUT ASS;

YOU'RE EITHER COVERING IT,

LAUGHING IT OFF

KICKING IT

KISSING IT

BUSTING IT

TRYING TO GET A PIECE OF IT

BEHAVING LIKE ONE

OR YOU LIVE WITH ONE!!!

>>>haha funny noh? got it from an email.. too bad i have a small ass though hehe

SIngLehoOd

2006-05-15T17:51:00.000+08:00

Q: Why are you single/not dating anyone?

Answers:

Super confident biatch: Because I’m pretty, smart and rich so guys are intimidated by me.

Low self-esteem: Coz’ I’m a loser. I have nothing to offer…

Slut: Why stick to just one guy? There are a lot of fishes in the sea…

Idealistic: I’m still waiting for Prince Charming to sweep me off my feet.

Romantic: Destiny will come and reveal Him to me and it just so happens that it’s not yet today.

Narcissist: I love myself and I’m not willing to share it with anyone

Desperate: I won’t be single anymore if you’ll take me…

Bitter: Because all men are jerks and its no good to be in a relationship

Reality bites: Because 40% of good men are taken and 60% are gay!

ATHENA: Because I’ve just found out Mr. Right was on his way to meet me but he made a few wrong turns, got mugged and was shot to death. Seriously I don’t know maybe you’d want to conduct an opinion poll or something… =)

WANTED BOYFRIEND
21 – 27 years old
At least 5’8 tall, good looking with pleasing personality (preferably chinito)
With a college degree from a reputable school
With good family ties
Loves watching movies, pizza and good conversation
Sweet, understanding with a bit of a crazy side
Please call 1-800-DESPERATE

yyyiiiiikkkkkkkeessssssss

2006-05-15T17:46:00.000+08:00

Yikes I can feel summer closing down on me with an earth-shattering bang. What happened to me this summer: finished initiations, a few drinking sessions, soul searching, updated with lost friends, nonstop reminiscing, gluttony, lethargic existence, attacks of anxiety coupled with depressed state, impoverishment, and head-on collision with reality… I’ve been to hell and back…

I don’t like getting old
Decisions yet to be made
Responsibilities to fulfill
Afraid to fail and disappoint
I no longer live for me alone
I look in the mirror troubled
Gone was the girl eager to conquer the world
Rather I see a terrified face stressed out
Paralyzed with fear, unable to function
Incapable of saving oneself
Ghosts of the past haunting me
Monsters of the present wounding my soul
Anxiety for the future burying me deeper
Yet I shall not succumb
Not to a misery I’ve created myselfI shall stand up build up the confidence
Be strong for everything we’ll fix itself somehow
For no one can help me except me

Pictures pa DIn!

2006-04-17T11:14:00.000+08:00

Jacuzzi shot.. imagine we tried to fit all in one tub which I think is good for 2 lang hehe oel it was fun.. the bathroom is really cool great for foreplay haha...
"damn! are those real?!"
feeling FHM model... (pagbigyan niyo na me...and no im not pregnant!!!hehe) wont hurt to compliment me just a little bit... =)

FavorIte Subic Pics

2006-04-17T10:59:00.000+08:00

The whole gang after sunset...
Trying-hard cheerleaders in water...
Seven candidates for Ms. Universe
Oblation.. bwahaha

2006-04-17T10:51:00.000+08:00

Just drying up from All Hands Beach in Subic... Picture taking to the max...

QuOtes quOteS qUotES

2006-04-06T11:53:00.000+08:00

"I want to be someone's last call of the night and his first thought in the morning... i want those 5 hour conversations that end in 'no, you hang up first'... i want the heart racing, palm sweating, whats gonna happen next moments... i want the hugs that you never want to let go of and the stolen kisses that are always the sweetest... but most importantly, i want someone to think of me as HIS..." aawww... - forwarded text quote

"What if flirtation? One might say that it is behavior leading another to believe that sexual intimacy is possible, while preventing that possibility from becoming a certainty. In other words, flirting is a promise of sexual intercourse without guarantee." - Unbearable Lightness of Being, Milan Kundera

"What is unique about the 'I' hides itself exactly in what is unimaginable about a person. All we are able to imagine is what makes everyone like everyone else, what people have in common. The individual 'I' is what differs from the common stock, that is, we cannot be guessed at or calculated, what must be unveiled, uncovered, conquered." - Milan Kundera

"Destiny is not imaginable, except in dreams or to those in love..." - i forgot where i got this one

2006-04-05T13:47:00.000+08:00

fun fun fun in subic!!! we should do it again next month? hehe the other pics i'll post next time individually...

Just Friends

2006-04-05T13:41:00.000+08:00

A friend of mine and I was talking last night and we realized we’ve known each other for almost a year now and we met thru some dating site (no we didn’t actually went out on a date) and he asked me why we’re still friends and I said “di mo kasi ako nilandi eh…” that’s how it goes for me. I usually stay friends with guys who haven’t tried to make a move on me or maybe tried but stopped and accepted the fact that we’re never gonna be anything else but friends. Of course that’s another reason they stay aside from the fact that we should have at least something in common. I love those types - sensitive enough to understand and sweet enough to stay and be a really good friend. I know some people say the best boyfriend/husband is someone you have been friends with for a long time, but for me there’s just no romance there if you started out as friends you stay as friends forever.. well except maybe if he’s a scrawny, ugly geek back in highschool and turned into Chris Klein 10 years after and making millions on his own hehe… im so shallow… hihihi

Btw go watch the movie just friends, it’s a nice movie and really funny… don’t forget to watch it! =)

BUsy, BusY Week

2006-04-01T22:51:00.000+08:00

MONDAY: last exam for the school year – the comprehensive exam luckily I passed so I think I’ll be getting a plus one on all my grades so yippee! I need all the extra points I can get. Then late afternoon went to Makati to go shopping for swimsuits, it was great we found really cheap yet really nice stuff so we had several good buys so we were really happy except I didn’t get to buy new flipflops and shades because there wasn’t enough time because shops close at 8 and we spent too much time fitting swimsuits hehe… nweis it was a supposedly great day turned scary because of a maniac cab driver. I was wearing shorts that night because it was so fucking hot they’re not skimpy mind you just short shorts – I usually don’t worry of being harassed because I don’t have good legs but turns out legs are still legs and can still turn on fucking pervs.. nweis I was waiting for a cab outside g3 with two other people and the cab just stopped right infront of me so I was just so glad I get the cab but turns out he picked me because I was sexy daw and the other girl was ugly and may bf pa daw na kasama that freak!! Hindi pa metro he said 180 na lang daw and im like no way so I haggled to 160 and made up a crazy story of my life as he asked me one question to another all the way home ..that im from isabela, and my name is anna, im 17 years old (I figured if I told him im underaged he’ll be scared to rape me but as my friend pointed out after I told them I think it turned him on more), and I live with my parents and my dad’s a sergeant and works in the fort ( I totally have no idea about the police ranks and where they actually work) and I have a bf of twoyears and he’s my neighbour, and that im a first year student in ust blah blah… it was scary the cab doesn’t have a plate number written on the sides of the door so I was really really scared.. he even took notice of the motel and asked if I knew what the place was and im like no and I almost jumped out of the cab.. I know I shouldn’t have chatted with him but I was afraid if I go bitchin on him that would provoke him he even asked for my cell number or my landline. He even introduced himself Edwin daw name niya!!! Fuck good thing he brought me home and didn’t make anymore moves after I refused to give him my number.. scary! Im never gonna wear shorts in public again!

TUESDAY: Vacation time baby!! Went to Subic with med frens stayed at the Yacht Club and we went to the All Hands beach. It was fun fun fun!!! I’ll post the pics next time…

WEDNESDAY: Went back to Manila, and another disaster.. We got into a car accident on our way home somewhere in Banaue in the intersection in Cordillera, ung van bigla na lang sumulpot out of nowhere and bumped into us, lakas ng impact! it was scary the whole right side of Aimee’s car ang tinamaan, nabasag ung ilaw and kelangan palitan buong hood ng car while ung van sa gilid ung tama but we went to a full stop the van on the other hand umikot pa so I think it really is his fault kasi ang bilis niya and hindi siya nagminor eh intersection un so we spent like an hour or two in the police station and turns out pareho silang walang insurance and ayaw mag kanya2 nung nakabunggo sa amin so they’re still going to court. I really hope it all works out well…

THURSDAY: gimik with Jen’s cousins and some UP blockmates… haha Thursday nanaman (mahilig kaming gumimik ng thurs ewan kung bakit) but good thing there were people in Decades sa Timog although there was this freaky guy who cant seem to take no for an answer, he was ugly, short, fat and maniac uli basta scary.. we didn’t meet any guy kasi ang susungit namin if a guy comes up we don’t talk to them if they’re not our type and obviously lahat ng lumapit di namin type haha and if ever may cute nga bading ata or di din kami type… sigh…. Di na ata talaga me mabenta.. im old hehe

FRIDAY: Hed kandi party at world trade center…VIP BABY!! Yeah thanks to angielie we had our own place there with overflowing vodka and I got drunk again! Fuck! Nweis the place is overflowing with people saw tim yap, polo ravales, models and more models so yeah I didn’t meet anyone as well because all the cute guys I spotted were either really young or gay.. plus the fact that we had our own area a little higher than everyone else made us so unapproachable (no im not making excuses for not getting hooked up) and if u go down to the dance floor its so hot u’d die from dehydration or hypoxia so it was really not an option… but all in all party was great!

So basically this week is all about gimiks - its so crazy so many things happening all in the same week and so I need to rest even if its Saturday today and I bet gimik places will be overflowing with people I really dont care and I drank enough alcohol to keep me saturated till next month hehe – so no more drinking nweis I need to reflect on my life holy week is just around the corner and I still haven’t abstain from anything hehe

ayaw ko na ng siopao

2006-03-18T14:19:00.000+08:00

ayaw ko na ng siopao

oo naadik talaga ako

araw-araw gusto ko

madalas sa gabi hanggang umaga

ewan ko ba

medyo magastos pero masaya

masarap ang siopao

nagpapangiti, nagpapatawa

laging laman ng utak ko

ang siopao sa kanto

minahal ko ang siopao

ngunit minahal ba ako nito

hindi! hindi! hindi!

hinayaan akong mahulog

malulon sa siopao

umasa ako ngunit ganun talaga

matagal pala maluto ang siopao

hindi ko na kayang magantay

sawang sawa na ako

kaya ngayon ayaw ko na ng siopao...

>> pasensiya na panahon ng kaweirdohan puro aral na lng kasi ginagawa ko.. kung di niyo toh gets well ganun talaga kasi di niyo talaga alam ang buhay ko... at kung naweirdohan ka nga talaga bakit hanggang dito binabasa mo pa din?! hahaha

haha i actually have time to blog

2006-03-09T15:15:00.000+08:00

guess where i am? in the lru while waiting for the practical exams to be over so i'll be able to get my stuff and go home.. well whats up with me? well school basically... we placed 2nd for our grueling Mulawin-inspired play during the Nutrition Fest in Biochemistry.. tiring as it was to be directing it was so much fun like being back in highschool once again being all tensed and busy but not really studying.. fun!! i wish i was also one of the actresses though, acting has always been fun although Im not really good at it but its always is a fun activity...

and yeah i dont know if im suppose to tell or its supposed to be a secret but one of my bestfriends got married yesterday!!! yup married at 21 years old and no she's not pregnant!! she's doing it for love... wow!!! i commend her for her courage and i envy her for finding the person she can spend her lifetime with.. im supposed to be one of the bridesmaid but obviously i wasnt able to attend the wedding... sigh... (i think i'll be missing a whole lot of special occassions in my love ones' lives with my chosen field.. ) but i was there in spirit and i truly am happy for her...

well 2 more weeks of hell and im free for the summer!!! yahoo! yahoo!! im so excited... i wish i'll get the perfect tan and a hot summer fling!!! wish me luck!!!

iM iNSpiRed

2006-03-06T19:13:00.000+08:00

I AM HAPPY
I AM INSPIRED
I AM INFATUTATED
WITH A GUY NAMED JOE
HE MAKES MY HEART JUMP
HE MAKES ME TINGLE
I THINK HE KNOWS
ALTHOUGH I TRY TO BE SUBTLE
BUT I CANT HELP IT
I AM IN GREAT AWE
IM ON A HIGH
JUST BY THE SIGHT OF HIM
IM HAPPY
IM INSPIRED
THANKS TO A GUY NAMED JOE...

HELL MONTH

2006-02-18T15:02:00.000+08:00

finals during college was called hell week but now its hell month in med school.. im gonna be busy the whole month of march so u guys might as well consider me dead.. exams, quizzes, papers, mtv, musical presentation of Mulawin about nutrition, school sucks!!! haha im so busy i dont know where to start so here i am doing what i do best slacking off haha.. oel just pray that i'll pass all my classes and wouldnt need to take the removal exams...
oh yeah valentines was as crappy as expected pigged out for lunch with classmates and then slept the whole day.. haha talk about being bitter but come to think of it, it was better than having a boyfriend that didnt give you anything that day or worst memories of your girlfriend/bf breaking up with u that day haha...
miss me a little u guys!!! and lets have fun for the summer!!! mwwwwwaaaahhhhhhhh!!!

Tips on Dating

2006-02-11T18:29:00.000+08:00

I’m not a master dater in fact I’ve only been on a few dates in my whole lifetime and some doesn’t seem to count as a date so really I’m no expert. But I do wanna share my thoughts on dating, even if I wont be dating for some time probably because as my friends always comments about me I’m “high maintenance” but really I still can not accept that. Anyways here are some tips:

1. The guy should at least pay during the first few dates. I mean c’mon guys I know times are hard and we’re on the 21st century but still a true gentleman pays for the date no matter what. (or at least majority of it)

2. Dress up or at least smell good if you’re really the dress down type. This goes for both men and women. I mean even if the person is like your longtime friend or your next door neighbor you should still look good during a date.

3. Special occasions like birthdays, Christmas, valentines, anniversaries calls for a gift. Yes a gift is expected even if you just met if it just so happen that the timing is during a holiday/event in her life. As materialistic as it sounds, I still believe in its the thought that counts if you don’t have money write a letter or a poem or anything just give him/her something, be creative!

4. Girls always bring extra cash. I know I said guys should usually pay for it but you’ll never know when you’ll need to pitch in with the bill or you have to save yourself from him and you need cab fare. Haha

5. Be a gentleman. Pick her up, take her home. Be on the dangerous side of the road. Open the door for her. If you’re not the type at least try to be. I know I said be yourself but still try to be the nicest person that you can be.

6. As cliché as it sounds be yourself. Be talkative and show some interest to your date. Ask questions and don’t answer with one liners. Don’t just say yes or no to a question share your thoughts…

7. Never check out other people while with your date. Concentrate on your date. Unless you two talked about “people-watching”.

8. Kiss her if the date went well. Safest way to go is to kiss her on the cheeks or if she’s really conservative a “pa-cute” flying kiss might work and might earn you some pogi points.

9. Don’t forget to text him/her for to say thank you for the date. Whether you think it was good or bad, it’s courtesy to at least say you got home safely. And saying “goodbye nice to know you but I don’t ever wanna see your face again” is acceptable for the worst date of your life… hehe

10. And lastly, always and I mean ALWAYS have FUN!

Me and my thoughts

2006-02-05T14:28:00.000+08:00

ONE YEAR AND COUNTING THE TWISTED THOUGHTS

2006-02-05T14:22:00.000+08:00

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO THOUGHTS OF A SENSELESS MIND… yes ladies and gentlemen, its been a year since my last blog…it was feb 5, 2005 when my blogging addiction started when I was so bored with my life, no social life whatsoever because I wanted to make sure my I’m “good to go” for graduation and I was hoping someone would fall inlove with me... pathetic as it was my ulterior motive I continued writing not for the same reason of course but for a far better cause. Writing my thoughts down made me feel in touch with something besides all the studying I had to do. I remember being obsessed with trying to come up with interesting stuff to write about and when I do write something I get all excited. I don’t know who follows my writing or if anyone does but a comment or two about it always boosts my ego and makes me want to write more. I know I’m not a good writer, I have to get my grammar checked once in awhile but I know somehow what I write about is interesting or at least entertaining to some people.

So y am I still here? I don’t know I guess somehow it became a therapy to me squeezing my brains out, to remove all the thoughts whirling in my head all the time, you see I’m a professional daydreamer, (so if you guys need any suggestions on what u can daydream about don’t be afraid to ask for help =p) and I also love archiving. (to leave a little mark as I move from one phase to another of my life).

I don’t know how long I’m gonna be here but I hope some of my thoughts have somehow touched yours even for a millisecond…

NOSTALGIA

2006-02-02T19:37:00.000+08:00

i wish i can stop the habit of thinking about the past... daydreaming about it wishing that it can happen again. its so annoying longing for something that was gone, something that is supposedly over. I mean i have no regrets to all the things i've done before i mean i wouldnt be me if i didnt do those things but sometimes some people i've met in the past kept resurfacing in my head and yes they were part of the good/bad/crazy times but longing for them to be back in my life is not gonna do me any good, they had served their purpose in my life and now i have to move on...

5 minutes

2006-01-30T16:25:00.000+08:00

haaayyy... nothing to write about hehe quick 5 minute thoughts see what i'll be able to write about...

i saw LRU guy today he's gained alot of weight and his hair is getting pretty long,ooohhh... dirty haha

january is almost over and still things aren't the same w/ my so called "friend" so fuck its over i think... i wish i can control the urge to text him....

mom's turning 57 tomorrow yikes she's getting older but she has recovered quite fast from her mild stroke so its all good

3 years and 12 days since my last exchange of fluids.. haha u have a dirty mind... im happy and proud to say im still a virgin u perv! as my friend said "buti pa ang lupa nadidiligan.." ya its been dry land since that day.. got scared i guess.. it was just kissing really... but.... times up!!! till next time

Thank God for my…

2006-01-25T16:10:00.000+08:00

“You should be thankful that you have normal organs…” says our embryology professor during our lecture of the development of the female reproductive system. She told us a story of one of their patients about not having a vagina. She did not have any menstruation and getting pregnant will be difficult, if not impossible. It became a problem when she was about to get married and that she had to go get an artificial vagina and a rubber must be placed inside her to keep it open. Unfortunately the fiancé backed out of the wedding. And the rubber keeping it open should be removed eventually but she forgot so she had a rectovaginal fistula and matters became more complicated. She didn’t give us all the details and she said she doesn’t know what happened to her but like she said earlier, all I can say is “Thank god for my vagina!” Hehehe

Shifting Exams...Toxic?! naah

2006-01-14T12:42:00.000+08:00

exams nanaman and yet here i am again blogging away ate kasi makulit about the trip to singapore thru tigerairways (fyi: its in clark, pampanga) which is suppose to cost only Php 2500 2-way if u book now for april till june.. as if i have savings.. oh well i hope matuloy kasi believe it or not d pa me nakasakay sa airplane or nakaalis sa luzon hehe and this is the first time im actually going to be free for the whole summer.. that is if i dont have removal exams (wala un hehe di na pwede!) waah and daming problems this year kakainis.. oel im keeping this one short for now.. i'll try to update next week we're going to Euro Carnival on friday! I'm so excited!!! Tara!!! =)

101 of the Thoughts of The Senseless Mind

2006-01-09T22:56:00.000+08:00

YEY turns out I have 101 entries already including this one and the pictures... im happy to be sharing my thoughts and my life to all.. i thank everyone who takes time to read the crap i've been writing. For all the people who comments and gives their feedback I"ll be forever grateful... Love u guys.. Please continue reading and I will try to update my blog as often as possible.. because as you can see I dont have a life!!! haha no i just like writing about stupid stuff I cant say out loud to everyone... next month it would be one year since my last blog... so cheers to my 101 post and for more to come!!! =)

Pre-Valentine Post

2006-01-09T22:34:00.000+08:00

Too early?! Well maybe but really we can talk about love anytime of the year. Question is why? Why talk about love when talking about it doesn’t give it justice... love is such an incomprehensible feeling. It is indefinable once u actually feel it. But me? Well im on a never-ending search for it. Yes, I am loved by so many yet I yearn for true love - that is love for someone true, someone real.
Valentines is just around the corner. Despite the fact that now it is merely just an exaggeratedly commercialized event, a lot of people: couples, “friends”, barkadas still celebrate it, even if it’s said that only jologs people go out on dates during the 14th and that it is a chance for girlfriends to demand for flowers, chocolates, bears and whatever to their boyfriends, for single men to take advantage of lonely women or vice versa, and for whatever reason its still here to stay. It is a sad day for bitter people, mating season for some. (have u noticed so many people are born on November? think think…what month were they conceived?)
Three years ago, I went out on a date and watched the BoyzIIMen concert with a dating friend, it was a really bad date according to him, but I’m saying it was a supposedly good date gone bad, details I don’t want to share. It was my first date exactly on Valentines day, but it was not as fun as expected. Two years ago I went out on a date with one of my girlfriends (no im not a bisexual!) and watched Brian McKnight with BoyzIIMen (again! hehe love ‘em), it was fun made a couple fight a bit because the guy sitting beside me kept staring at me haha. Last year was an inuman party with the barkada. And this year I don’t think the guy I like would ask me out, so no date for me this valentines. So Im just hoping for the best, that valentines will pass by in a blur and ill be too busy to realize it is valentines day ...

suPpressed emotions??

2006-01-05T17:53:00.000+08:00

i've been having bad dreams lately.. like things aren't always going my way or something like that...and i usually wake up in the middle of my sleep might have something to do with my big curly hair haha.. but its scary really... im a spoiled bitch and i usually get what i want. {well not last year =( } anyways maybe i have suppressed thoughts on the back of my head.. oel i'll update you guys once i find out what its all about.. or maybe i havent been praying before i go to sleep?? =) tsk tsk

haunted dreams
what do u want
why now
it should be over
sealed and forgotten
yet it comes up
staring up at me
mocking
laughing
haunting...

Joaquin Frederick my baby...

2006-01-05T17:39:00.000+08:00

Yes ladies and gentlemen.. its immaculate conception haha.. so far he's my favorite nephew.. y? because he's only 6months old and he doesnt bug me that much.. yet.. hehe

New Year New LOOK...

2006-01-02T22:38:00.000+08:00

This was taken during Christmas day.. my hair was super straight...

the following day.. im curly!!! haha i know i told my friends its because of depression but really its the new me!!! curling my hair is the next step to forgetting him... the jerk who dumped me (well not technically but more or less its like that).. it was nice knowing you pero KUNG AYAW MO DI HUWAG!!! hahaha no more bitter days... i swear!!! i love myself and im proud of who i am if nobody can see how great i am then its their lost!! =) YEAH go curly chicks hehe... Barbecue anyone???

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2006-01-02T22:31:00.000+08:00

yey happy 2006!!! another year has passed and even if last year was a year of several accomplishments in my life, it seemed like it was just another ordinary year nothing new, no heartstopping killer experience that would have made it a memorable year... usually i make a yearender list in my journal (yes i still keep a journal!!! haha like my very own pensieve for my eyes only stuff hehe) but 2005 was just another year of my life really nothing worth noting for... so what are my new year's resolutions for 2006?

1. Save money. (Say no to impulse buying...)

2. Concentrate. Focus. Thou shall not let thy mind linger... no more daydreaming!!! (btw Im
a professional daydreamer hehe)

3. Study harder, party less ( i swear im gonna try!)

4. No more bitter days!!! C'mon im old enough to finally get over the fuck-im-still-single-stage (i can live w/o boys for now thank you very much... )

5. Do something nice/good to other people w/o expecting anything in return (this is like athena's little project for a oneway ticket to heaven thingie hehe)

CHEERS TO THE YEAR OF THE DOG MAY WE ALL BE BLESSED WITH THINGS THAT WE DESERVE AND GROW TO BE A BETTER PERSON..

BBBBRRRRRR...

2005-12-23T23:00:00.000+08:00

finally i can feel the cool air on my face
like a splash of ice cold h20
christmas spirit
lingering on me
making me smile
keeping me happy
for im am once again
in the arms of the people i love
and of people who loves me back
family, friends, and jesus
its what this holiday's all about =)

Must Have been Love… or Not!

2005-12-19T23:04:00.000+08:00

>> Three different stories of three girls looking for love and failed but managed to survive and learn a few things about men and themselves.

Vanessa is so bored with her life, school basically keeps her busy until she hooked up with her long lost friends where she rekindled the bonding with one of the guys - Josh. It all started out as an innocent flirting incident, during the constant drinking parties they had with several other friends until raging hormones got in the way and eventually led to something deeper. But it turns out Josh has a girlfriend and he was just in it for the fun, like most guys just wants another girl on the side. So Vanessa, a smart girl, just left and hoped that some other guy will see her real worth – a lost jem waiting to be discovered.

Charlize is the craziest person in the world but when it comes to love she gives her all. But sometimes her strong personality gets in the way. This may seem like a bad trait but it was something that mesmerized Kent about her. The relationship was bound for marriage until Charlize had to go away. This greatly scratched the relationship because Kent was weak. He couldn’t handle the distance, the pressure for marriage and the possibility of something or someone better. Eventually someone had to let go and the years of smooth sailing was a thing of the past. But since Charlize was a tough woman, she concluded that maybe some good things come to an end to welcome a better future…with somebody else.

Trisha’s a tease she loves flirting and playing around, she’s never been in a real relationship because she thinks that no guy will ever meet her standards until she met Olsen. Olsen was “the guy” she was waiting for. So she played the courting game with him, Trisha acting as the guy, and Olsen being the girl in the situation. She knew Olsen likes her but is not ready to be in a relationship so she made her move hoping that will make him realize the connection between them, only to find out that Olsen is really not into her, not ready to complicate their friendship. He just wants to be friends, no more no less. So she decided that Olsen wasn’t worth all the trouble, he might have been the one for her but she wasn’t “the one” for him, so she gave up and learned how to live life as she knew how and decided to look for someone else that is truly destined for her.

What a Boy Wants

2005-12-09T22:43:00.000+08:00

Men are really simple creatures: We see something we want, we go and get it. If we don’t want to do something, we won’t do it except upon pain of death. If we want to say something (which isn’t very often, I’ll admit), we say it. The old caveman cliché is true: see pretty girl, bonk her on head, drag her to cave, ungga.

When it comes to courtship, men don’t play games. If they like you, they will pursue you (whether you like it or not). If they don’t like you, they won’t, except, again, upon pain of death. When they treat you as a buddy or as a sister, it’s because that’s what you are to them. It's that simple. Now of course, there are exceptions. Torpe men have been known to exist, to the ridicule of the rest of mankind. But given time and the proper opening, they’ll know what to do.

In this day and age, more and more girls are trying to turn the courtship tables and pursue men. Sure, why not, I say. Many men are blind to their own feelings and sometimes an aggressive woman is what it takes to wake them up. Love, after all, is a greater mystery than men or women, and sometimes it just grows. But a word of warning: most of the time, men have their minds made up about you from day one.

>> got this article from seventeen... i dont know i just feel like posting it i think i agree with the author.. sad but true.. and i also have that attitude i rarely change my mind about someone especially a guy, if i already categorized you as a friend, you're gonna be just a friend, and if i dont like you then i dont like you end of story. simple, right?

Tattooed on my mind

2005-12-04T13:40:00.000+08:00

damn i cant get HIM out of my head... i constantly think about him distracting me from studying or doing anything else, the only thing i talk about is him and he's not even my boyfriend.. far from it... co'z we're just friends.. yep! "JUST FRIENDS!!!" i keep on telling myself its okay atleast ur friends... but then the daydreaming never stops, hope still lingers on the back of my head, my fingers still crossed - that maybe someday somehow he'll fall for me... i actually dont know if im falling for him or im just infatuated. I dont know him that well except for the fact that we have alot of things in common and we're just friends... sigh... my bestfriend says maybe im just hooked on the idea that i want a boyfriend, but when the time comes that he actually sees the light, i'll back out.. because im afraid of being in a relationship, afraid to be distracted of my well polished plan of nonstop education and vow to celibacy till im filthy rich and i've somehow paid my parents in full for everything... urrrgghhh but why does he have to be so nice???!!!

I'M A jOGGER!!!

2005-12-03T22:17:00.000+08:00

yeah finally i had the desire to push through with my plans of losing weight and keeping fit for the holidays and the upcoming summer vacation...how? by JOGGING! ever since i started going to UST, i've made deals and invites with anyone who's willing to jog with me some agreed some didnt but despite all the talk, i never did... but today i finally decided to go for it. Thanks so much Tina!!! but my body aches like hell and i dont know why im having a slight headache... did all the blood and oxygen got shunted to my virgin muscles? haha yeah my muscles are kinda virginal never had the proper exercise except maybe during my p.e. days back in college haha anyways i really hope this will continue till i get Britney Spears abs haha... fyi: i lasted for 2 1/2 rounds, with alternating walking and jogging for 15 minutes! haha I sucked!! but hey its my first time, i just need to practice... hopefully i'll be able to jog 3-4 times/week... wish me luck!!!

jUSt Like HEAVEN

2005-12-02T23:59:00.000+08:00

"Alcohol is a social lubricant, makes man brave and woman loose..." (so right about that, so I think since humans are natural social beings we should all drink and be happy! haha)

"Righteous!" (said with a smile by Napoleon Dynamite)

that's about it, its a nice movie never gonna happen in real life but still its makes me want to go back to believing that there is someone destined for me.. plus the fact that Reese Witherspoon is a doctor in the movie makes it a whole lot interesting for me, like a view of the future Dr. Siman haha well except for being a non-dater haha (i hope so)... anyways its a nice friday night stress-reliever hehe

Oh yeah we also went window shopping, I was suppose to go shop for stuff for the people on my Christmas list but I ended up seeing more stuff I wanna get for myself... haha
1. the XOXO white bag in Rustans... so nice!!! cost: around Php2500
2. Belgian Chocolates from Marks & Spencer (Php >400-1000)
3. All the Earrings from that shop infront of L.A. Gear in RP (Php 399-499)
4. Sandals from Charles & Keith, white with a bejeweled star embellishment (Php1200)
5. Board Shorts by Billabong (Php2000++)
6. Green Haviannas (Php600-900)

>>> as u can see all the stuff I want are all impractical and I dont have money to buy all these stuff oel I wish Santa is real and would be kind enough to drop it off for me haha... yey... pasko pasko pasko nanaman muli!!! =)

Long Weekend with the Family

2005-11-27T19:46:00.000+08:00

haaay... i really didnt want to go home for the weekend for one thing i've got 3 exams this coming week plus i hate commuting but what the heck my dad just turned 60 so he threw a party to welcome himself to the senior citizen world haha yeah 20% discount, now that's what i need... =) yeah my dad is like the greatest, but now he's showing signs of aging, he has become really stubborn and he wants everything done real fast.. i just wish he'll get over the andropause stage real soon because its not a very nice stage, he used to be a charmer but now he's usually rude... but of course i love him all the more... and yeah my 4 nieces and 2 nephews are around so its total chaos around here... i swear kids are not my field so dont expect me specializing in pediatrics i mean i like them but only for a certain time limit hehe i really have to work on my patience for years to come...

PRIME

2005-11-24T22:10:00.000+08:00

i just watched the film today it stars Meryl Streep, Uma Thurman, and Bryan Greenberg ( Jake from One Tree Hill ring any bells? he's payton's bf) anyways didnt expect him to be that cute, i mean he's H-O-T!!! the movie is about a 23 yr old thats David (Bryan) and Uma (i forgot her name in the film haha short term memory for women's names sorry hehe) 37 and Meryl Streep being David's mom who is Uma's psychiatrist.. it has funny dialogue and interesting plot.. kinda classic older woman-younger boy story with an unusual twist.. watch it, its nice plus Bryan's really hot... oh yeah i already mentioned that.. hahaha makes me wonder if i were in her shoes would i wanna go for a younger guy who rocks my world and so willing to fulfill my sexual desires? hhhmmm... depends... =)

Monito-Monita aka Kris Kringle

2005-11-22T18:53:00.000+08:00

ooohh fun christmas is in the air oel here's my accomplished questionnaire for our kris kringle... hope everyone starts feeling the spirit of Christmas... Christ, love, family and gifts!!!

Kris Cringle Questionnaire

Name: Maria Athena C. Siman

Nickname/s: Athena, Atung

1. Favorite color? Green

2. Favorite genre of music/artist? R&b, alternative rock, acoustic, Kelly Clarkson, MYMP, Bamboo, Black Eyed Peas

3. Favorite author? Wally Lamb, Paolo Coelho, J.K Rowling

4. Favorite cartoon character? Carebears =) or Marvin the Martian

5. Favorite food? Chocolates, donuts, pizza

6. Favorite movie/ movie genre? 50 first dates, a walk to remember, wedding singer, American pie, changing lanes, john q., I am Sam

7. What are your hobbies? Malling, watching movies, gimiks, blogging

8. Tell us something that you think the subsection does not know about you.
Hhhmmm… I don’t know I’m the what-u-see-is-what-u-get type but I guess if you think I’m a snob, I’m not! I’m approachable just get to know me a little. But then if you think I’m nice, well I’m not that nice haha =)

9. Wish List:
Dear Santa,
I think I’ve been good this year so if you’re feeling generous my wish is a small bag from Bayo or Girbaud hehe… But since the economy is in such a bad shape right now and I know you have a long list to fill the book Angels & Demons or any recent album of the above-mentioned artists is enough to keep me happy throughout the holidays. Merry Christmas in advance!!! hohOHO!!!
Love lots,
Athena

YM and the sex-crazed Indians

2005-11-19T23:28:00.000+08:00

I was so bored the other night so i decided to try going in to one of the chatrooms in ym... i think it was supposed to be a university channel... anyways turns out most of the people in the chatroom were either indians, turkish, and jordanians.. it was really interesting,they speak really bad english except for the turkish people who are really cute by the way, like Ruffa Gutierrez' husband very manly aside from the fact that he's a fucking prince! haha anyways im not a racist or anything i like to know other races but the indians... tsk tsk they're all horny mind you.. probably because of their food haha(oh yeah i ate at BOLLYWOOD in GB serving indian cuisine you guys should try eating there really cool just dont try their dessert, there's even a real Indian dj playing indian music r&b, rap, fast, sexy songs hehe)or maybe because the women there are so wrapped up so they dont see too much skin hehe... i know im being rude besides all man is innately horny... anyways i dont know what's the deal with this cyber thing well maybe at least now there's a webcam and you can actually see the person but dont u need something real to actually feel something? oel the wonders of the thalamus...

UUURRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

2005-11-17T17:47:00.000+08:00

STUPID! STUPID! STUPID! yeah check out my blogsite worse than ever i tried changing my template but i didnt realize that would delete my tagboard and stat counter which by the way i can not remember what sites i got it from and i am in no mood to download and learn how to do it all over again!!! fuck! im not in a very good mood today didnt have much sleep because i watched HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE last night! great movie!! the best i've seen so far among the HP movies.. i was in such a good mood when I went to sleep and bam when i woke up im in a shitty mood! and now this!!! fuck! sorry i cant stop swearing... i just hate myself i've been trying to improve the look on my site and look what i've done.. oh crap!!! nweis had some nice thoughts last night but im in no mood to write today so this ends this shitty blog!!!

Sembreak 05

2005-11-14T22:12:00.000+08:00

YUP the start of sembreak total alcohol fever.. its like SEMBRK = DRINKING TIME... dinner at chili's because we're feelin "old" to go clubbin hehe... with my good old friends that i've known since forever... had 5 1/2 san mig strong ice that night so i got really wasted... but nonetheless i think we all had FUN!!!

2005-11-14T22:10:00.000+08:00

wasted...

2005-11-14T22:07:00.000+08:00

yeah i got really drunk!!! puke myself to death... too bad some guys were hitting on us already.. haha good thing i was with my good old friends who took good care of me...

bestfriends for life

2005-11-14T22:04:00.000+08:00

mags, jureane and moi the evil trio is back during octoberfest!!!

2005-11-14T22:01:00.000+08:00

Nov 1 with rox and jureane... one drink per bar but we only went to 4 bars and we're already tipsy "uhaw na uhaw sa beer" hehe

2005-11-14T21:58:00.000+08:00

Beshpwen and I during ferd'z despidida party.... sori wala me pic ni ferdz but he's a really great guy i'll surely miss....

Wala lang

2005-11-10T18:23:00.000+08:00

i have nothing to write about well nothing i would want anyone to read anyway... im on a mixed emotional state right now im happy and sad at the same time... i wonder why... maybe its just because its red day today haha... oel on 2nd thought i do want to write something hehe... i wish to get rid of my obssession with finding "the one"...i wish i'd actually start being patient and learn to wait... i guess patience is a virtue i can never master. i remember a guy friend of mine predicting that my first real boyfriend will be my first and last and i said no way!! haha it doesnt seem to fit my personality or maybe i just dont know myself too much i've never been in a really serious relationship to actually know how much i can give to someone... i guess i'll just have to wait...wait...wait... =(

....

2005-11-10T16:47:00.000+08:00

Depress-depressan

2005-11-09T17:59:00.000+08:00

oel i definitely have alot of stuff to be depressed about... T.I.I.S for life - Tangina Im single!!!

A few Days Left

2005-11-03T11:07:00.000+08:00

going back to school again on the 7th im not excited... coz' it would mean grueling nights again, tension, stress... stress... stress... oel i chose this path so might as well accept it with open arms... i enjoy being home but i've gained some fucking weight, pimples in massive attack, and a year's worth of crunches for my beer belly waaahhh so maybe its good to be back to school again atleast i can go on a diet there because my parents aren't there to forced-feed me hehe... oh yeah i have another problem my computer kinda crashed so i dont know what im gonna do bringing it to the computer shop was not a very good idea they made it worse stupid technicians! oel a few days left and i intend to enjoy it as far as i know octoberfest pa din hahahaa... yes im an alcoholic!!! hehehe

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind

2005-10-28T14:51:00.000+08:00

have u guys watched this movie? ganda... weird but nice and i got this really nice quote too..

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot
The world forgetting by the world forgot
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
Each prayer accepted and each wish resigned.

-Alexander Pope

(as quoted by Kirsten Dunst in the movie)
coolness...

wAaahhhh... bitter days uli

2005-10-24T19:09:00.000+08:00

he's taken... well so is every other cutie guy i like... haaayyy there must be something about me that guys dont seem to like or thats not gf material... siigghh... oel im bound for singledom for the rest of my life... its a fact i have to accept... siiigghhh... waahhhh its the holidays once again and its getting colder by the minute... and i dont mean the weather duurrhhh!!!

BoreDamn

2005-10-21T23:39:00.000+08:00

i hate being bored because i tend to do stupid stuff that i usually regret after.. when im bored i always have this habit of trying to make things happen... like text someone i shouldnt be texting in the first place... or send a message to a guy that is so part of the past that i shouldnt be in contact with... or get drunk and feel shitty after...the longing for something exciting to happen always makes me do something crazy... thank god im more mature now and im trying to get a hold of myself... after all ive branded myself as "the master of self control" haha somebody save me... boredom is a killer...

Eyes Wide Open

2005-10-17T02:05:00.000+08:00

my friends and i went out last friday and we got to sharing a few things... y do some guys like kissing with their eyes open? aint that weird or what? they say its better and u can feel a lot more when u kiss with ur eyes open.. if u ask me i've never tried it... i means its weird like staring at each other while u guys are like super close. and won't that make ur eyes crossed coz where r u gonna look? at his eyes? ur lips? his nose? or some other place? hhmmm is it like the "in" thing now that some people has discovered? haha am i too long out of the lip action business that i dont know about it? haha oel i've asked a few other guys about it and they said they prefer it close so i guess the guys we were talking about were just plain weird... haha

2005-10-17T01:55:00.000+08:00

High on diesel and gasoline, psycho for drum machine
Shaking their bits to the hits,
Drag acts, drug acts, suicides, in your dads suits you hide
Staining his name again,
Cracked up, stacked up, 22, psycho for sex and glue
Lost it to bostik, yeah,
Shaved heads, rave heads, on the pill, got too much time to kill
Get into bands and gangs,

Oh, here they come, the beautiful ones, the beautiful ones

Loved up, doved up, hung around, stoned in a lonely town
Shaking their meat to the beat,
High on diesel and gasoline, psycho for drum machine
Shaking their bits to the hits,

Oh, here they come, the beautiful ones, the beautiful ones.

You dont think about it,
You dont do without it,
Because youe beautiful,
And if your babys going crazy
Thats how you made me,

La, la, la, la...